(:

.Thursday, April 1, 2010 ' 11:33:00 PM Y

~a closure to the guy i've always been hoping to be friends again, or even more...~

tt day (tues, 23rd march), i was at shop...
after my lesson... doing my work...

then i happen to look out of the shop...
and i saw the side view of a person.

although i didnt get to see his face, i could feel my heart skipped a beat.
it's the feeling of familiarity...

he's not alone... a girl was walking beside him...
plus... the girl looks familiar too...
then, the little bro of the guy whom i've always been thinking of ran after them...
tt's when i sort of figure out the linkages...

the guy i saw was him...
the girl is his gf... the same one on his dp at friendster...
it's been about 3 years already...

at tt time i was sad...
sad tt my childhood guy is now someone else bf...
and tt they are going rather steady...
only child's sense of possession is very strong.
sad tt we are no longer able to go back to the day when we parted without proper goodbyes...
i was still holding on to the thought tt the feelings and all remain stagnant at tt time...
and if we were to ever talk to each other again, be friends once more,
the feelings and all will come back naturally to us...
continuing from tt day we drifted apart... 12 years ago...

it's never a nice feeling to dash someone's hope...
the hope of reunion... with tt someone special...
or at least... i thought he was tt special one for me...
since he was my only playmate during my childhood...
he was the only friend whom has held my hands before,
he was the only person who played and danced with me to the rhythm of tt song,
he was the only person who has exchanged item with me,
he was the only one whom i opened my heart for...

but i missed out the fact tt i may not be his only playmate...
i may not be tt someone special for him...
i may not be on his mind...
or even worse... he may not rmb we shared those sweet and innocent memories...
it's only my one-sided feelings...
aniway, we never started...
only child can really be imaginative on wild thoughts...

i went out of the shop and saw the 3 of them walking off...
looking at their backviews, strangers would have thought tt they are a family...
his age gap with his bro was quite big...

i know i have to let him go... from my mind...
if i dont do so... i will be the one who suffers...
he wont even know...

memories wont be erased... and they cant...
i will hold them dear to me... those sweet little things.
but anything extra, i will try and forget about them...
those one-sided wishful thinking.

right now, i think the best solution to help me to forget about him,
is to get me a new person to focus on!
and hopefully it's not me being one-sided.

can someone be brave enough?

I love pink & black ❤